Sexual Surrogacy Therapy

Sex surrogates or surrogate partners are practitioners who help in addressing issues of intimacy and sexuality. Usually, a sex surrogate works with a sex therapist to meet the goals of their client. It involves the use of physical touch and/or intimacy.

Sexual surrogacy is often sought by those with sexual dysfunctions, lack of healthy intimate experiences, traumatic history, physical disability, low sexual desire, and lack of experience and so on. This form of therapy was introduced by Masters and Johnson in their book “Human Sexual Inadequacy” published in 1970.

Although not common and highly controversial due to its probable ethical and legal difficulties, research over the years has proven its effectiveness. In their book, Masters and Johnson believed that people could learn intimacy only by experiencing it. They partnered subjects and carried out sequence of exercise intended to help overcome sexual dysfunction.

It is a three-way relationship which involves the therapist, sexual surrogate and client. The sexual surrogate and therapist work together with continued communication to help the client. The therapist addresses the client’s issues first through talk therapy, then explore the option of a surrogate partner when necessary. The interaction between the client and the surrogate partner is for the client to practice what was learnt during the talk therapy.

There are four stages of sexual therapy which are Emotional Connection; Sensuality; Sexuality and Closure. In the first step the surrogate and client build emotional connections and bond. It is important that the client feels safe and secure with the surrogate partner.

Second stage involves exploring the client’s sensuality which includes physical touch and nudity, but no sexual arousal. The third stage is where both surrogate and client focus on sexuality. This involves sexual arousal, oral-genital stimulation, sexual intercourse and so on.

The last stage is the close of the therapy when goals have been achieved.